Heart vs Brain

My heart is an optimist.  My brain is a realist.  On the daily—I struggle to get them to negotiate—let alone agree.  As the saying goes, “I’d rather be an optimist and a fool, than a pessimist  and right.”  That being said, there are times I would like for my brain to pick up a bat and beat some sense into my heart.  When my heart is in the position to make decisions, chaos will most assuredly follow.

Throughout life, we are encouraged to follow our passion.  Unfortunately, most of us have a passion, better known as a hobby, which would never support itself, or us effectively.  One of my friends loves to dance.  She has wanted for years to make dancing a profession.  Unfortunately, many have compared her dancing to a seizure.  Luckily, her day job is much more lucrative.  

Let’s go deeper though.  How about following our hearts.  I’ve spoken about the love of my life in prior posts.  He has the ability to completely flip my world.  I mean Charlie Brown with a full flip.  Why?  Once the heart knows what it wants—it’s difficult to shut it off.  I can be skipping along in life attempting to forget I have emotions and feelings when my heart decides to kick in—reminding me of HIM.  Sometimes it’s actually him reminding me of HIM.

A few weeks ago he was texting me.  Now, to those of you who believe text has the ability to have a full, healthy conversation—think again.  This rationale is on the same path as thinking jogging is just as efficient and fast as driving to reach a destination.  Texting is a brilliant way to miscommunicate anything and a great way to misinterpret everything.  Texting was meant to say things quickly.  For example, running late or trying to find someone in a noisy place.  It’s not the correct context to discuss life topics.  When did it become appropriate to have full conversations via text?  Some reading this might disagree.  How does one know when anyone is serious or joking.  Case in point—HIM on a random text states, “why don’t you come live with me?”  Because we haven’t been in the same vicinity, let alone state, in years, I assumed he was joking.  Remember the meaning of “assume”.  You make an ass out of you and me.  Get it?  “Ass”—“U”—“Me”?  Even though he was just trying to jolt me, it was still a nice thought—so—I  thanked him.  Set off the explosions.  Ghosting ensued.  He was ticked.  When I finally did get him to respond.  He declared how upset he was I dare call him a liar?  Um—what?  Crap—he was serious.  Who seriously texts a life altering decision?  Welcome to my world.

My personal life is a maze of odd lunacy.  I digress.  

Anyway.  Back to the heart—brain connection.   If only we didn’t care what people think.   

Life opens up opportunities—you either take them or sit afraid making excuses as to why you shouldn’t—couldn’t or wouldn’t take them.  One thing is for sure—those encompassing the latter group will be the first in line to give their opinion if you fail.  Ignore them.  They are noise.  

The start of a new year is a time when many of us set goals to improve our lives.  I don’t think anyone will set out to make a goal to make our life worse.  If you are one of those, may the force be with you.  For those of you setting goals to challenge yourself in the new year, sticking to those resolutions can be challenging.  First question would be is it realistic.  My neighbor, bless her heart, is in her 70s—a former smoker—probably 60 pounds overweight.  She waved me over last week while rolling the trash to the curb.  A glass of scotch in one hand and the bar rolling the trash in the other.  I met her as she bounced the wheels on their final approach to the curb.  She asked me what my new year resolutions were.  After the past couple of years my only thought, “to stay alive and get healthier”.  She nodded her head in agreement.  Then declared, “I’m going to start running every morning, 5 miles at 5:00am!”  Well ok then.  Her declaration proud and excited.  Who am I to judge.  I gave her a smile, a wink and a thumbs up.  I’m up every morning at 5:00am.  No sightings of my neighbor.  Yesterday afternoon she walked over and declared she liked scotch better than early mornings.  Goals have to be realistic.  

My grandmother used to tell me a story about a pack of dogs and a cheetah.  The dogs were very good friends.  Often bullying and harassing everyone around them.  One day they decided to challenge the cheetah to a race.  They wanted to prove they were faster.  However, the cheetah didn’t move.  He had zero to prove.  Think about this.  Cheetah’s are fast.  Why does this need to be tested?  Sometimes, trying to prove you are the best is an insult.  Never go down to the level of others in order to show your strength.  Your energy should be reserved for goals you create for yourself.    Just like the cheetah who only needs speed to hunt, and not to win a race.  Don’t waste your time proving your worth.  It should be understood.  If it’s not—you’re not with your people.  If your value is not easily noticed, do not waste time attempting to convince them of it.  

So back to the heart—brain conflict.  The heart will always rationalize what the brain knows is not logical.  

When you lose all of your excuses,  you find your results 

You must learn who is gold and who is gold plated.  Spend no more energy on the gold plated.  You deserve nothing less than genuine people with genuine intentions.

A lion doesn’t concern itself with the opinion of sheep.

There’s nothing selfish about prioritizing your own happiness and doing what’s right for you, so don’t listen to the doubters and critics who only wish to see you fail. Believe in yourself, do what needs to be done to reach your goals and work hard consistently until you get there!

May all of your New Year’s resolutions be successful!